Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Two Weeks Notice

For the last 6 years I have had the privilege of staying at home with my 2 beautiful girls. There were many times in the first few months that I dreamed longingly of going back to work. I have taken in a few jobs over the years but always with my kids with me, I got to watch a friends twins in my home, I worked in the children's dept. at our church, and I have done freelance graphic design. But now, I have to get a real job. I always thought I had one, but since I only got paid in kisses and hugs, it doesn't help to pay the mortage.

So starting August 3rd, I will be one of those women who choose a career over spending the day at home with her kids. My heart is breaking. I keep trusting God that this is his plan, BUT I WANT MY PLAN! I go to sleep in a state of anxiety worrying about them, I wake up all jittery still worrying. But with this recession, there are no guarantees that my husband will have a job next week, and with his hours already having been cut for summer, we needed to make some changes. So someone else will give them hugs when they're hurt, will get to read them stories, and will listen to the funny things they have to say. I miss them already!

I have always wished we had the money to do more for them. Unfortunately, now we won't have as much time to do it. Sigh.

In the words of Anne Shirley,
"I am considerably rumpled in spirit".


Mary on Lake Pulaski said...

My thoughts and prayers that things will be okay for you and your family.

Lori Pierce said...

I know it's hard, but it will work out. Few women would choose to leave their children, but it's something most of us don't have a choice about. I think it's wrong to say you or these women are "choosing a career over your children." You're being way too hard on yourself. We get jobs to support our children, and all that we do is for them. Yes, you will certainly miss them but you will still see them and have time with them. Yes, it will be hard but try to stay positive.

Mary said...

Everything will work out. Think positive thoughts.

Leah said...

My heart goes out to you, Kami. That would kill me. I know that you are doing the best for your kids, and at the end of the day that's all you can do. Just take it one day at a time. :)

Anonymous said...

Keep the faith. Take care of your self and the girls will be fine. Life is a roller coaster and is more fun if you learn to enjoy the ride. And we are all here for you. Granpa Lee

Eileen said...

Hi Kami,
Just remember you are not choosing to be a working Mom it's out of necessity! It breaks Traci's heart to be working too and not even to have a loving husband to come home to. You are blessed to have such a wonderful husband. Kids are so resiliant and adjust much better than adults!! I'll keep you all in my prayers.